Desire and tradwives
Abby's Reading: 34
No books this week. So make this, “Abby’s Listening and Reading on Substack” I suppose. It was a big week for our family, which included me returning to work following eight weeks of paid maternity leave (a first for me! such a gift). It seemed to fitting to share three links that I think converse well when read together on the topics that are deeply personal in my life right now.
A Conversation About Desire from (video)
This discussion between Jen Pollock Michel, AJ Swoboda and Luke Burgis on desire is well worth you time. I’m looking forward to reading more from Burgis on the mimetic (imitative) nature of desire… I just picked up his book from the library last week.
What are Women Allowed to Want? by (Substack post)
As the primary caregiver to my three young children and someone who is employed part-time doing work I deeply love and care about, I’m interested in the conversation around #Tradwives, both personally and professionally.
I’ve read some bad posts on tradwives, some ok posts, and some good posts. This post is excellent.
How Humility Nourishes a Weary Mom's Soul w/ Hannah Anderson from Risen Motherhood (podcast)
writes that we need a better way to approach conversations about women and motherhood that are not tied to binaries such as the SAHM/working mom. Could not agree more! And I’ve been think a lot about what ought to guide and animate our conversations about women, mothering and work.I think those of us in the Christian faith tradition in the United States need to interrogate our desires (to work, to homeschool, to stay home fulltime, to work fulltime, etc… no one is exempted) while resting under the authority of God’s Word and in the context of loving community (see above from Jen Pollock Michel).1
And…
We ought to radically embrace humility. Embracing humility is what Hannah Anderson gets at in this excellent podcast linked above. I first listened to this podcast 5+ years ago after first becoming a mom and while cultivating a new chapter in my professional life. It deeply shaped the way a thought about my desire to mother and be home with my kids and my desire to work outside the home while finding my footing as a mom.
I returned to Anderson’s podcast on Risen Motherhood this week, wondering if it would hold up, especially since it originally aired in 2017. Not only did it encourage me anew, but dare I say it’s more relevant now, amidst these charged conversations about women and their desires?
Excelsior!
Looking big picture, I want to be part of a pluralistic society where parents who choose fulltime caregiving (especially in the 0-5 years) are supported and not penalized, and where female equality (esp. in the workplace) is not “premised on remaking ourselves to be more like the median man,” to use the language of Leah Libresco Sargeant.
So glad you are re-sharing that conversation with luke and AJ! I routinely refer back to it in my mind!
This is great curation! I love Hannah Anderson's writing and missed this podcast somehow. Adding it to my podcasts to listen to.
And thank you for drawing attention to the SAHM/working mom binary. All moms are working moms, whether it's paid work or not, outside work or not. I wish we had better ways of talking about this so we could support all moms, regardless of whether they are "like" us.